Tag Archives: Adam
But He couldn’t quite decide how to split them between Adam and Eve. He thought He might just as well ask them. He told them one of the things He had left was a thing that would allow the owner to pee while standing up.
“It’s a very handy thing,” God told them, “and I was wondering if either one of you had a preference for it.”
Well, Adam was so excited he jumped up and down and begged, “Oh, please give that to me! I’d love to be able to do that! It seems like just the sort of thing a man should have. Please! Pleeease! Give it to me!” On and on he went like a happy little boy.
Eve just smiled and told God that if Adam really wanted it so badly, he could have it.
So God gave Adam the thing that allowed him to pee standing up.
Adam was so thrilled he just started whizzing all over the place – first on the side of a rock, then he wrote his name in the sand, and then he tried to see if he could hit a stump ten feet away – laughing with delight all the while.
God and Eve watched him with amusement and then God said to Eve, “Well, I guess you’re kind of stuck with the last thing I have left.”
“What’s it called?” asked Eve.
“Brains”, answered God.
The Meenister’s Log
God said, “Adam, I want you to do something for Me.”
Adam said, “Gladly, Lord, what do You want me to do?”
God said, “Go down into that valley.”
Adam said, “What’s a valley?”
God explained it to him.
Then God said, “Cross the river.”
Adam said, “What’s a river?”
God explained that to him, and then said, “Go over to the hill…..”
Adam said, “What is a hill?”
So, God explained to Adam what a hill was.
He told Adam, “On the other side of the hill you will find a cave.”
Adam said, ‘What’s a cave?’
After God explained, He said, “In the cave you will find a woman.”
Adam said, “What’s a woman?’
So God explained that to him, too. Then, God said, ‘I want you to reproduce.”
Adam said, “How do I do that?”
God first said (under His breath), “Geez…..”
And then, just like everything else, God explained that to Adam, as well.
So, Adam goes down into the valley, across the river, and over the hill, into the cave, and finds the woman.
Then, in about five minutes, he was back.
God, His patience wearing thin, said angrily, “What is it now?”
And Adam said….
“What’s a headache?”