Harry Edsel Smith of Albany , New York :
Looked up the elevator shaft to see if the
Car was on the way down. It was.
In a Thurmont, Maryland , cemetery:
Here lies an Atheist, all dressed up
On the grave of Ezekial Aikle in
East Dalhousie Cemetery, Nova Scotia:
Here lies Ezekial Aikle, Age 102.
In a London , England cemetery:
Here lies Ann Mann, who lived an old maid
But died an old Mann. Dec. 8
In a Ribbesford, England , cemetery:
The children of Israel wanted bread,
And the Lord sent them manna.
Clark Wallace wanted a wife,
And the Devil sent him Anna.
In a Ruidoso, New Mexico , cemetery:
Pardon him for not rising.
In a Uniontown, Pennsylvania , cemetery:
Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake,
Stepped on the gas instead of the brake.
In a Silver City , Nevada , cemetery:
He was quick on the trigger,
A lawyer’s epitaph in England :
Here lies an honest lawyer,
John Penny’s epitaph in the Wimborne,
Reader, if cash thou art in want of any,
Dig 6 feet deep and thou wilt find a Penny.
In a cemetery in Hartscombe , England :
On the 22nd of June, Jonathan Fiddle went out of tune.
Anna Hopewell’s grave in Enosburg Falls ,
Here lies the body of our Anna,
Done to death by a banana.
It wasn’t the fruit that laid her low,
But the skin of the thing that made her go.
On a grave from the 1880s in Nantucket ,
Under the sod and under the trees,
Lies the body of Jonathan Pease.
He is not here, there’s only the pod,
Pease shelled out and went to God.
In a cemetery in England :
Remember man, as you walk by,
As you are now, so once was I.
As I am now, so shall you be,
Remember this and follow me.
To which someone replied by writing on the tombstone:
To follow you I’ll not consent,
Until I know which way you went……