Tag Archives: mice

A cat goes to Heaven

 

A cat dies and goes to Heaven. God meets him at the gate and says,’you have been a good cat all of these years. Anything you desire is yours,all you have to do is ask.’ The cat says,’Well, I lived all my life with a poor family on a farm and had to sleep on hardwood floors.’ God says,’Say no more.’ And instantly, a fluffy pillow appears.

A few days later,6 mice are killed in a tragic accident and they go to Heaven. God meets them at the gate with the same offer that He made the cat. The mice said,’All our lives we’ve had to run. Cats,dogs and even women with brooms have chased us. If we could only have a pair of roller skates,we wouldn’t have to run anymore.’ God says,’Say no more.’ And instantly, each mouse is fitted with a beautiful pair of tiny roller skates.

About a week later,God decides to check and see how the cat is doing. The cat is sound asleep on his new pillow. God gently wakes him and asks,’How are you doing? Are you happy here?’ The cat yawns and stretches and says,’Oh,I’ve never been happier in my life. And those Meals on Wheels you’ve been sending over are the best!’

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Mice Balls

This is reported to be true story is about a minister (who is not a computer literate person by his own admission)

He told of a real phone call he received from the church secretary.

Secretary: Rev, we’ve got a problem with the computers in the church vestry where you met with the confirmation class last week – Some of the boys in the class started messing with the mice.

 Minister: What?!?! (thinking: we’ve got mice in there????)

 Secretary: Yes, it seems some of the boys removed their balls.

 Minister: (incredulously:) Th..th…they did what?????? How in the world did they do that?

 Secretary: They must have used a screwdriver or something.

 Minister: We’ve got some pretty sick boys… I… I… didn’t even realize mice had balls…

 Secretary: Yeah, they roll around on them all the time.

Minister:: What?????? (still thinking of the little fury real animals) Well…what can we do?

Secretary: I guess we’ll have to put them back on

Minister: WHAT????????!!!!!!

Secretary: Hmmm….Rev, are we talking about the same thing?!

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