Bus Driver

 

Life is scariest when it feels hopeless. In those moments, we all need someone to reach out and remind us that it gets better. Every 40 seconds, someone takes their own life. We can take action to prevent that last  resort for so many people, like how this bus driver reached out to a  total stranger to help her reconsider an irreversible decision. Times like these remind me of the good in people and that we must support and look out for each other always.

Miami Taxi Drive

I once took a cab ride from Miami airport to Miami Beach.

The driver was a Hispanic guy whose English was limited.

“You from Britain?” he asked.

“Yes, from Scotland”

“I have a cousin who lives in Cardiff, do you know him?”

We moved on…

“I notice that you have various faith symbols in your cab… rosary beads, pictures of the saints, a crucifix…. but also Sikh symbols  and Buddhist and Taoist, Jewish, Muslim  and many more; are you an ecumenical person?”

“Qué?”

“Is it for the benefit of your passengers of different faiths?

“No,” he replied, “I’m just hedging my bets!”

To Dublin – many years ago…. I always got slightly apprehensive when pulling away from a bus stop, the driver would cross himself; did he know something we didn’t?

An old joke…. my grandfather died suddenly and peacefully at the job he loved; can’t say the same for the passengers  in the bus he was driving at the time!

The Hippy and the Nun

A hippy gets onto a bus and sits next to a nun in the front seat. He looks over and asks the nun if she would have sex with him.

The nun surprised and shocked by the question gets up and gets off at the first stop

When the bus starts on its way the driver says to the hippy, “I can tell you how you can get that nun to have sex with you”.

“How?”

The bus driver tells him that every Tuesday evening at midnight the nun goes to the cemetery and prayto God.

“If you went dressed in a robe and glow in the dark paint mask she would think you are God and you could command her to have sex with you”

“What a great idea!”

So on Tuesday he goes to the cemetery and waits for the nun to show up.

At midnight sure enough the nun showed up, while she was in the middle of praying the hippy jumped out from hiding and says. “I AM GOD” I have heard your prayers and I will answer them”

“BUT … first you must have sex with me. The nun agrees but, blushes and says that it will have to be done “another way”  so she might keep her virginity because she is married to the church.

The hippy agrees to this and has his way with the nun.

After he finishes he stands up and rips off the mask and shouts “Ha, Ha Ha I’m the hippy!!”

Then the nun jumps up and shouts “Ha Ha Ha I’m the bus driver!!”